Well, isn’t it amazing what a difference a day can make! Look at our beautiful new Tahitian Delight bathroom wall! Yesterday morning it was a plain blah white wall (which is why I didn’t include a ‘before’ picture…anyone can imagine what a boring plain white wall looks like, right?).
So, yesterday it took us awhile to get the Tahitian Delight green paint to stick, but while I was typing yesterday’s blog, hubby resolutely closed the door and when he came out 20 minutes later, it was fixed.
And very green.
Today we started the wainscoting, which neither of us had done before, though hubby had done similar work while finishing a few basement stairwells. Still, he was quite apprehensive about this project. Luckily, our favourite local Home Depot go-to guy was there yesterday and when he heard what we were trying to do, his eyes lit up and he led us directly to a wainscoting kit, complete with panels, chair rail and baseboard. Hubby’s eyes lit up at the sight, and he visibly relaxed into the first glimmer of enthusiasm I’d seen thus far.
So it didn’t take us very long to do this part today…the pieces all snapped together and hubby hammered in a few nails here and there to hold it in place and voila! It turned into a whole new wall! We still need to paint the wainscoting white, but it looks pretty good as is, so we’ll take a break for now.
Pretty exciting. And, of course, for someone who’s always admittedly a “work-in-progress”, it was another one of those mini-but-still-applaudable back-patting moments. Not as monumental as my recent solo train trip to Toronto, but still a brave new move forward.
Painting that plain white wall green – Tahitian Delight green to be exact (which turned out to be quite a bit bolder than anticipated) – was actually a big change for me. For some reason, painting walls anything but white or muted colours is very scary. I’ve long been afraid that the colour would end up “disturbing my peace”, if that makes sense. I’m a very sensory person. Very sensitive to outside stimuli, whether it be noise, colours, abundance of motion, crowds…and while I’ve learned to handle all of that to the point where I hardly consciously notice anymore (though something deep inside of me still DOES notice and cringes when overwhelmed), I’ve tried to compensate for that by keeping my inside world calmer and less “noisy”. I find it easier – safer – to keep the walls painted in neutral muted colours, and then use other ways to bring in colour, like photographs, paintings, curtains and knick-knacks. Perhaps it provides me with an escape route, because if life gets too overwhelming, I can always change – or remove – those extra props (pictures, paintings etc) as needed in order to create a calmer sanctuary for myself.
Tahitian Delight green is a big step outside of that neutral safety zone. Even as we were slapping it on the walls, I could taste the fear and anxiety rising – afraid that I might not be able to handle this. It was too bright, too “in your face”. But I stifled the fear, because I didn’t think hubby would appreciate me changing my mind at this point in the project – fortunately my desire to be merciful to my dear tired hubby won out over a fear that I didn’t want to win this time. Beside, I kept thinking, if it really doesn’t work out, we can always go and buy a lighter shade of green and just paint over it, right?
Anyway, as the wainscoting went up, the fear subsided. And when we finally put that chair rail up, MY eyes lit up…it was beautiful, even better than I had imagined when I first dreamed up this idea. With the white wainscoting finished and the towel rack and picture back up on the wall, that large expanse of green shrunk to a much more palatable size.
Yes, it may just look like a very simple bathroom makeover job to most people, but to me, it feels like yet another step forward in my ongoing quest to be brave – to free myself from these ancient fears (such soul-sapping spirit-stiflers!) so I can soar across the open sky in untethered exuberance.
Yesterday I thought our Tahitian Delight was a disaster…today I think it might be another one of those stepping stones to freedom.